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August 01, 2005

No Wonder He Needs Viagra

Since he's been using weenie-shrinking pills to hit all those home runs:

Rafael Palmeiro, who last month became the fourth member of baseball's 3,000-hit, 500-home run club, will be suspended for violating baseball's drug-testing plan.

Of course, maybe someone spiked his pee:

In a prepared statement, Palmeiro said he could not explain how the steroids got into his body. "I have never intentionally used steroids. Never. Ever. Period," he said. "Ultimately, although I never intentionally put a banned substance into my body, the independent arbitrator ruled that I had to be suspended under the terms of the program."

Blech. Drug-using atheletes should be banned forever.

Posted by Mr. Bingley at August 1, 2005 12:59 PM

Comments

Speaking of weenies, "Ultimately, although I never intentionally put a banned substance into my body, the independent arbitrator ruled that I had to be suspended under the terms of the program" is a textbook sounding weenie excuse. The MSNBC story headlines it 'STEROID SHOCKER'. Um, not to anyone whoever took a good look at him.

Posted by: tree hugging sister at August 1, 2005 01:15 PM

You know, on Friday, I was telling Steve Silver that, although I suspected Palmiero, I couldn't deny him the Hall of Fame based solely on viagra commercial fueled suspicion.

I'd like to thank Raffy for giving me a reason.

Posted by: Bill McCabe at August 1, 2005 01:42 PM

"Teenie weenie"? Doesn't he get email?

Posted by: Ken Summers at August 1, 2005 02:01 PM

Hmph. Raffi's toast. I said it before, I sez it again - if you juice, you never go to the Hall. The end. (We'd have to empty a lot of busts out of Canton if the idea catches on.)

Posted by: Nightfly at August 2, 2005 02:29 PM