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April 12, 2005
I Feel a Protest Coming On.
What is it with these Wisconsin people and their guns? Kill, kill, kill...
Wis. considers legalizing cat huntingMADISON, Wis. (AP) -- Feline lovers holding pictures of cats, clutching stuffed animals and wearing whiskers faced-off against hundreds of hunters at meetings around Wisconsin to voice their opinion on whether to legalize cat hunting.
I'm sure in the hours before my flight to Madison I can rework something Joan Baez or Old Pete sang. Something expressing the anguish so evident in the words of the protestors.
One of the attendees was Katy Francis, who wore cat ears, whiskers, a cat nose and a sign that read, "Too Cute to Kill." For Francis, "The cat hunting thing brought me out because it was very extreme."
The BASTARDS! Hearts and minds people. Hearts and minds. Gearing up to lead the charge reminds me of my callow youth and my first great tree hugging crusade. When you're young, you see eeeville and you know you can change the world.
"Good Lord - I've heard about this - cat juggling! Stop! Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Good. Father, could there be a god that would let this happen?"
Yeah. Cat Juggling. Which leads, unless the filthy practice is obliterated as all men of good conscience know, inexorably to Kitty. Porn.
Oh yeah.
HELL yeah.
And you know it, Mr. Summers.
Even if you lack the intestinal fortitude to admit it.
Posted by tree hugging sister at April 12, 2005 10:33 AM
Comments
Kitty porn? Feh
Cat juggling? Kid stuff
But Cat Skeet - Now we're onto something!
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 11:17 AM
There are too many pussies in Wisconsin, eh?
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at April 12, 2005 11:42 AM
In honor of this occasion, I present..
http://www.burstfilms.com/flash/Kitten_Cannon.html
(Thanks to With Cheese! via Andrea Harris)
PS: Sorry, I don't know how do HTML links here.....
Posted by: The Real JeffS at April 12, 2005 11:55 AM
"The Night we shot old Frisky down" could be you theme song, sung to that old Baez tune...
Personally, I can think of a few dogs I would not mind using for target practice, but perhaps shooting the owners would be more useful.
Posted by: Crusader at April 12, 2005 12:33 PM
Where have all the kittens gone
Target pra-ah-ctice
where have all the kittens gone
all blown away...
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at April 12, 2005 12:59 PM
"Look forrrrrr the kitty's colllll-arrrrr…"
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 02:03 PM
"Imagine there's no kitties, it's easy if you try..."
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 02:04 PM
Or the Tom Jones classic"Shoot that Pussycat"....
Posted by: Crusader at April 12, 2005 02:18 PM
I didn't know Tom Jones was a protest singer!
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 02:23 PM
Posted by: tree hugging sister at April 12, 2005 02:40 PM
"I've shot at cats with both sights now
With peep and scope and still somehow
I can't seem to hit them worth a lick
The little bastards mooooooove
Toooooo quiiiiiick"
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 02:48 PM
I didn't know Tom Jones was a protest singer!
When it comes to cats he is....
Posted by: Crusader at April 12, 2005 03:04 PM
Goodbye wife, most dearest friend
I'm off to hunt felines again
Sure, killing cats protects wild birds
But frankly I'm more concerned with stinking cat turds
So if it's fluffy or it's cute I'll be the one who shoots
At Puss in Boots
While dancing to the sound
Of shotguns
"Fools!" said I "You do not see
There's more to cats than meeow and pee!"
Evil beasts they are there's no denyin'
Just read The Protocols of The Kittens of Zion
But my words, like old kitty litter fell
Just without the smell
Muffled, by the sounds
Of shotguns
And the people bowed and prayed
That every cat would be born spayed
And the cats ceased with their licking and pawing
And commenced anew with furniture clawing
And the people cried "our freedom's lying there, hidden deep inside some internet threads"
Oh, and armed CheeseHeads
Hunting to the sounds
Of shotguns...
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at April 12, 2005 04:08 PM
Bingley, that was inspired! I'd doff my hat if I were wearing one.
Posted by: Ken Summers at April 12, 2005 04:11 PM
Thank you, kind sir!
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at April 12, 2005 04:18 PM
Purrrr-fecto!!
Posted by: tree hugging sister at April 12, 2005 06:27 PM
Excellent, Mr. Bingley! Bravo!
Posted by: The Real JeffS at April 13, 2005 03:04 AM
Good stuff, Bings.
But, heck, is it the cat's fault that, even domesticated, it's helluva tough? And fast! And it likes milk! It's the Mr. T of nature...
Posted by: Nightfly at April 13, 2005 12:04 PM